“Pie Way or the Sky Way”

By Shawn

My family has some really productive arguments. Here’s an example:

Shawn: I think I want to become a crazy pastry chef whose catchphrase is, “Pie way or the highway!”

Mom: Or better–how about, “Pie way or the sky way”?

Ann: Mom, that doesn’t make any sense.

Mom: Well, neither does his.

Ann: Yeah, but his is a pun on an existing expression.

Mom: So’s mine!

Shawn: Yours kinda takes it too far.

Mom: It’s a double pun!

(15 minutes later)

Mom: I still don’t see what’s wrong with my version.

Shawn: This is… simply exhausting.

Ann: PIE WAY OR THE SKY WAY DOESN’T MEAN ANYTHING.

Mom: Sure it does.

Ann: Then what’s a sky way, Mom? Huh?

Mom: Well, what’s a pie way?

Shawn: Nothing, it’s just a pun!

Mom: Sky way is just a pun.

Shawn: No it’s not! It’s a random expression!

Ann: WHY ARE WE STILL ARGUING ABOUT PIE WAY OR THE STUPID FLIPPIN’ SKY WAY?!

Mom: I still don’t see what’s wrong with it.

Shawn: Okay. I’m going to take one more run at this.

(15 minutes later)

Shawn: So you get it now, right? “Sky way” doesn’t make any sense. It isn’t a pun on anything. It just happens to rhyme with “highway.” It is in absolutely no way related to the joke. At all.

Mom: Well, okay. But it makes it crazier. Don’t you two like crazy?

Ann: …That’s a point.

Shawn: That is a point.

Ann: Now I think I actually like it better her way.

Shawn: Yeah, I’m with you.

Ann: “Pie way or the sky way” it is!

Shawn: I’m glad that took 45 minutes.

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