Morning Rituals

By Shawn

We all have our morning rituals. Here’s one of mine.

  1. Get up.
  2. Go to coffee shop to work.
  3. Plug in headphones.
  4. Forget about discrepancy between speaker and headphone volume.
  5. Turn on music.
  6. Get not-so-subtle reminder of said discrepancy by accidentally blasting the shit out of self.
  7. Suppress startled scream.
  8. Attract attention of person sitting near me, who is alarmed by muffled yelp.
  9. Smile sheepishly and give “you know how it goes” shrug.
  10. Person does not know how it goes; looks away in mild disgust.
  11. Wait a day.
  12. Repeat.

Self, seriously, why won’t you LEARN, you damn idiot?

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s